Friday, December 09, 2005

Speed of life

Sometimes life goes so quickly it is hard to imagine it's been only 24 hours. I wrote yesterday about how wonderful a day it was but today was one of the worst days I've had in a while. This drastic change can be so hard to deal with. So i just wanted to spend a little time on bad days.

Bad days are inevitable. All of us have them. However they do not have to be that bad. They are hard because everything seems to be going wrong yet we have so much yet to do! How it is ever going to get done is an impossible thought. . . but that's where God never ceases to amaze me. In my despair I am not alone. I find that these days when everything is going wrong and you find someone who will listen. . . all you want to do is vent and feel better, but God speaks. The more he tries the more I argue my points back, however it doesn't take much to see I'm not very well founded.

God never gives up. He speaks through things we experience, friends, even IM's. I had a wonderful friend say to me today "please Erin, this isn't me talking. . . " the insistence of I know it hurts but listen to these hopeful words wasn't what i wanted to hear at the moment. . . but is what i needed to hear. God cares. He always has and always will. The bad days like today i just want to tell him I'm a failure and can't do it, find someone else. But i can see him smiling at me saying you can do it. I'm here and we'll do it together. You can't see it, but it'll be great. I'm not leaving. No matter how hard i try to pursuade it doesn't work.

He won't leave and he has shown this to me again and again through some magnificent friends. They have ever right to leave me. To let me be and give up, but no matter what i tell them they won't do it! Sometimes this makes me upset. I don't want them to see all my failure, but they don't care. They see more than my failure in me, who knows what, but they stay. That's part of God's love in them.

We will all have bad days. But as much as they hurt we don't have the choice of staying there. God says come on, lets rest and wait for tomorrow believe it or not i have a future for you, not for someone else, FOR YOU.

Numbers 14:18
'The LORD is slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion.
Deuteronomy 7:9
Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him.

God Bless!
*thanx Eric
~your sister in Christ~Erin

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

not being alone--good to think a/b during finals. i know i have a CRAZY finals week, I assume it's no different for the other collegey kids out there. hope it goes well! ((we're not alone!)) --holly