Monday, November 01, 2010

Oh Books... how I love you!!!! (dreamy sigh....)

I LOVE to read.  Just in case you didn't know.  LOVE IT!

It's a retreat into another world - wonderful, colorful, and full of all kinds of emotion and adventure.  I just finished reading Eragon, Eldest, and Brigsinger only to find out that their is a fourth book that concludes the story but isn't out yet!!!

I just started The Time Traveler's Wife.  Oh my goodness... (happy sigh...)  fabulous.

I was having a conversation with my grandmother (- who is also a reader) about what it is we love about books.  I love the characters - how you can relate, or not, but exploring who they are as a person and why they choose to do what they do with the situations presented to them.  Grandma loves the plot.  Very different from the characters, the story itself not necessarily who is caught up in it.  Finding that out is wonderful insight to my grandmother and what makes us different.  =)

I love people.  Young people - old people.  People in general.  Thank you God for giving me a love of your people.  I think it's where most of my patience comes from.  At the heart of the matter I do believe people are good, even though many times their actions are bad.  Due to circumstances unknown people make a lot of choices that don't make sense or get frustrated, but when you get to know someone you learn all the wonderful things about them.  Their likes and dislikes, how to encourage them or how to make them angry.  The little things - it's what I love about people and in connection - reading about people.

Often quoted from the bible is the saying "We were created in God's image".  People I get.  God?  Not so easy.  I can't just go over to God's place and hang out, learn the things that make God happy, the way God likes a sandwich or just watch the general day to day life of what makes God - well, God.  I want to know more - and all my questions point me to the bible.  But it's not the same.  It's like reading the diary of your best friend and wanting them to be there telling you about it instead.

Yet I was wonderfully warmed by the beginning of The Time Traveler's Wife.  In a way, I felt like it related to my relationship with God.  Sometimes I feel God's presence.  Sometimes I don't.  Sometimes I feel like I know God is with me and where we are going and other times I am alone and lost.  And often it happens abruptly.  I pray for the strength to keep seeking God.  To read and learn more.  To continue to deepen that relationship.

I love to refer to God as "the lover of my soul".  Most day's I can't imagine how anyone who has really seen my soul and who I am can love me, yet I am loved.  Loved and accepted and encouraged.  I also know love isn't just a feeling, it's a choice.  Many times when I am reading stories of what God has done I don't love God - I hate God.  Sodom and Gomorra?  Even the battle of Jericho?  What about the people who lived in that city?  What about the babies of Bethlehem?  It's complicated I know - sometimes it's about human free will... but sometimes it seems like it's about punishment and vengeance.  I have this love for people - all people, not just Christians, not just "nice" people - but all people.  I think if you get to know someone you can find redeeming qualities and pain that causes things that you don't like.  But we are called to love our neighbors.  Everyone.

Faith, Hope, and Love.  I've seen that if I share love, I can give hope, and eventually help teach faith.  But in that order.  Love someone first.  Not just the people who love you.  Love all of God's children.  and love God - even when it isn't easy.

That doesn't mean not to ask questions.  Niether does it mean in this relationship I will always understand or get my way.  But if God can love me with my flaws, I won't give up on loving God and trying to learn more and continue to seek.

In peace and love,
your sister in Christ~Erin

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